Thursday, May 1, 2008

Languages


You all know my Mac by now, the man who spent so much time at sea only to discover he was a farmer all along? Mac spent over 30 years serving his country in the U.S. Navy. His rating was Signalman which is in Communications. When we first met he was SM1 (Signalman First Class) and was very proficient at his job. He knew the Morse Code like I know Pig Latin (I know Pig Latin or Igpay Atinlay very very well). He taught me the basics of Semaphore, talking with flags. He is quite brilliant, is Mac. But one day he took it into his head that would like to signal to me from the bridge when the ship was pulling out for a deployment. He wanted me to understand what he was saying and so he taught me just enough to figure out how to swear in arm signals. Oh now that was not his intention at all. I was to learn how to intrepret "I'll miss you, and I love you"...but I was a very warped young woman, you see. And so the teaching me of a skill that I could "tweak" was a move I'm sure he regretted at times. I was feuding with a neighbor (Mrs. Perfect Edmondson, she was such a jerk) and we happened to be at the same New Years Eve party. We very purposefully avoided each other, but I overheard a comment the attycay ittchybay was making about the dress I was wearing (It was a beautiful red velvet, spagetti strapped confection with a flared skirt, a slip of crinoline showing at the left leg) saying ugly things about how it made my behind look and steam began to build. My eyes narrowed to slits and fire was pointed in her direction. Mrs. Edmondson caught my eye (detected the fury) and was hurriedly making her departure. I was practically jumping up and down my arms wheeling like deranged windmill paddles spelling out "SLMF". Mac, who had been deep in conversation with some of his pals, turned and caught the tail end of my silent tirade. He wrapped his arms around me, pinning my arms to my sides and putting his face close to my cheek as though kissing my ear,whispered "please don't make me regret teaching you to signal!" You know, it was the knowing she didn't understand one word of what I was saying that made the remark that much sweeter. And like Pig Latin, the translation of my remark is easy enough once it's out there in black and white...so, please don't blush. I'm much nicer now.

43 comments:

Jamie Dawn said...

Ha, ha, tee, hee, snort!

Mac should have know better than to teach you something that you could use for EVIL (hilarious) purposes.

Of course, even without his lessons, the middle finger could have been used. But, then she would have known what you were saying.

Vee said...

Hahahahahahaha...Sandi, you've made my day! My week!

You told this so well that I can see it all so clearly. Julia Roberts can play your part...just have to come up with somebody to play Mac and Mrs. E. (I am terribly dense so pig latin and arm signals are all lost on me.)

Diva's Thoughts said...

Ooohhhh!! Can you teach me some hand signals? OOOOhHHH!!!

Anonymous said...

Well, thankfully I couldn't interpret so I didn't blush. That is a sweet story.
Thanks for visiting,
Mama Bear

Mima said...

LOL, that brought a much needed smile to my face! Forgot to say before that I am glad that your Dad is doing better. Must be a huge relief.

Akelamalu said...

LOL oh please teach me some. There's someone I really need to signal bad things to!

windycorner said...

Ha ha! That's hilarious, Sandi. I can just imagine that scene with you in your beautiful gown and Mac trying to calm you down. Heehee....thanks for the giggles.
Holley

Merisi said...

I confess that I have not yet read your most recent posts, just wanted to let you know how sweet I felt that thought of yours was regarding making a Merisi movie. Would you believe that I had the same thought running through my overworked brain? However many people move, that scene there remained serene, don't you agree? I had not really time to stay there and shoot the scene, but I simply had to steal the time. Thank you for commenting! Hugs from Vienna,
M.

Jan said...

Oh you are so funny! I can just see it all playing out now! I am extremely proficient in Pig Latin...but not in the flaggy, arm thing! Has Mac ever taught you anything else like that since? lol!
Great story sweetie!

Jan

Carol said...

Sandi you have the devil in you at times...bad girl. I bet you were great fun to know at school but I guess that is a story for another day...hehe
Cxx

Mary said...

Sandi
I can understand the MF but not preceding letters will you email me as to what they stand for and maybe some diagrams on how to signal them I think it would be very useful!!!!

Anonymous said...

"Mrs. Perfect Edmondson".....howling with laughter

Unknown said...

Okay, that was one of your best stories ever. LOL I love the way you describe your dress and all the details. And I'm with the diva's thoughts, I need to learn me some hand signals. :-)

david mcmahon said...

Just brilliant. Hope your spirit never `flags'!

Took me a while to work out what attycay ittchybay meant!!

Mary Isabella and Kiley too! said...

Good job of retailing the events of that day. In plain English you are so funny. LOL.....Mary

Anonymous said...

Thanks Sandi you have always been such a doll!

Sam Fox said...

What a picture you paint in my head! Hilarious!!!

I would have swung for her or at least emptied a drink or five down her sorry excuse for a frock...

Yours sounded divine by the way - obviously the green-eyed beast was on full alert!

Thanks for checking up on me! I'm off on Sunday for Oz - just blogged a bit about it, and added a post from another forum "How I met My Other Half"
xx

Adla said...

awww the sorts like mrs Edmondsons so deserve to be given the signal to shut up ! What a nasty ole ahem ahem...

Terri said...

Too funny!!!
I would have done the same thing, though! LOL
Terri

Jeanne said...

LOL Oh Sandi I love you girl! That's too funny. Great great post. Oh and Brooke did get the boot as you know and about time. I changed my header up so you should be able to see it now. : )

Jane said...

Great story! Thanks for stopping by my blog. If you want to know what a fart machine is, check back for today's 'Postscript.' ;-)

smilnsigh said...

LOL!!! I love it!!! But I can't figure out the meanings of SLMF. I have an idea for the MF. But, come on. I have to know.

So... As to not hurt any *virgin eyes* here in your comments... right now! Not in a few minutes! Right now! Write me at warrrmmm at yahoo dot com and tell me!!!!! And that's an order! >,-)))))))))

No, it's a Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze and thank you! Please... Please... Please...

Mari-Nanci

Kari (GrannySkywalker) said...

Yeah, I think I got the MF part, but what's SL? You have to tell me! This is important information I might need one of these days so fill me in. lol

Carolyn said...

Good one. Very funny. I'd love to be able to swear in Semaphore. That could really come in handy sometime.

Thanks for stopping by my blog, eh!

PAT said...

Love this story Sandi!

We're home again! J has even driven the truck! He's on the road to recovery and will see the surgeon, next week, for follow up!

Good to be home!
Pat

Sandi McBride said...

Without going into too much detail...the SL stands for So Long (sort of a fond farewell the Signalbridge of the ship remaining on shore would send to the Signalbridge pulling out to sea...I didn't mean it fondly

Christine Boles said...

HAAAAAAhahahahahaha!

Unknown said...

LOL Sandi! I could do with learning some of that for when I am substitute teaching ;-)

Justabeachkat said...

Oh girl! I'm so glad I wasn't drinking anything while reading this post. I'm on George's laptop and I don't think he would appreciate liquid on it! LOL The attycay ittchybay deserved more. Great post.

Hug!
Kat

Leah J. Utas said...

Oh my I enjoyed your story. You're quite an entertaining writer and I will smile for quite some time over the SLMF incident.

Jennifer S said...

Oh, that is funny! And you tell the story so well.

Thanks for stopping by my place and for your comment. Have a great weekend!

Lee said...

Great story, Sandi! I'm sorry I didn't comment earlier but I'm glad I read the other comments because now I know what SLMF means. :) Can you still do that signaling? It might make for some interesting invitations. (weg)

Hugs!

NeereAnDear said...

You just crack me up!! I can picture you with your arms swinging to and fro and hubby pinning them down as he whispers his plea plantively in your ear....

U GO GIRL!!!

I have a nightmare neighbor like that ... can you teach me a few of those signals?? I only know one Italian thing thats done with the arm!!

HUGS AND LOVE

JO

Penny from Enjoying The Simple Things said...

LOL! Well, she certainly deserved it!

My sweet hubbie was in the Coast Guard for several years during Viet Nam and after, before I met him. He was a radio man. He never taught me morse code, but after we met and we were remodeling, he made a mistake and said something really, really bad......I didn't say a thing. The next day, I was hammering and missed a nail. I let loose with the words he used the day before. He laughed so hard he almost fell off the ladder he was on :-)
Hugs,
Penny

Jeff B said...

And here I thought you were such a quiet and sweet woman. Bwahahaha

Country Cottage Chic said...

ROTFL! You are such a hoot Sandi!

kari and kijsa said...

Oh my!! Teeheee!!! Perfect!

Have a blessed Sunday!

smiles,
kari & kijsa

Jeni said...

Just in case you have any little secrets in your closet that you're holding out on us, I just tagged you for the SIX THINGS meme. Come by and pick up the rules, then Enjoy!

Terri Steffes said...

I blew milk out my nose.

What a great story! I am so glad it is posted for my constant joy for eternity.

I had an autistic student who learned the ABCs in nautical flags once... he wrote his spelling words out in flags so I had to learn (quickly) how to spell in flags, too.

smilnsigh said...

'Tis May 5 now, and no new posting here. Hope all is well. Hope you aren't 'under the weather' too.

Mari-Nanci
Smilnsigh
Photos-City-Mine

LivingTheLife said...

Oh...what I wouldn't pay to see that little scenario...I wish someone had thought to video that little exchange. You did the right thing...I think ole "battle axe" got exactly what she deserved! And I loved that you let her have it...she knew you let her have it...but still didn't know what you let her have! Ha! Loved it...yes, I have a bit of a mean streak running down the entire width of my body, too...yep some people just need a good ole hand single or two every now and then...they just do!

Blessings...
Teresa

John-Michael said...

Uncle Charlie was a Signalman and he and I would exchange messages across the supper table (much to the well-deserved distress of Mom.) But I remember it as such great fun to have that special link with him. Thank you for the reminder!

Lovingly ...

Susie Q said...

Oh wow...using such a gift for evil!!
And oh how I LOVE it!!

Your life should be in a movie...a movie of that book you are SO gonna write!!

Love,
Sue