Friday, August 3, 2012

Summer Rerun...Papa Loved Mama




I'm not sure yet what the title of this post should be. It will have to come to me as I tell the story. I often tell you that I was brought up by Ricky and Lucy Ricardo. That's because they were not dissimilar from that famous TV couple. Daddy, the hot blooded Latin (from Quito , Ecuador) and Mama, the zany red head (and only her hairdresser knew for sure) from the Carolina's. The accents meshed somehow, as did the personalities. Their love and devotion often clashed with their tempers, but it always worked out somehow.

Yes, I'll be the first to admit that while their love carried them all over the world, their spats were never dull and often accompanied them along with their luggage. When the green eyed monster reared his ugly head, the luggage became baggage and the fight would be on. My mother, a beautiful woman, often caught the eye of men and it killed my father, while it simply tickled my mother. I can hear him even now..."that man was looking at you." My mother, smiling at him would simply say, "it's a free world. Looking costs nothing." Glares all around would be the order of the day.

Daddy never talked about himself. He would only talk about Mama and what all she had accomplished in her life, as though she had done it without his help. He would tell about the missions of mercy she often found herself embroiled in, providing medicine in South America for those who could not afford it or were unable to obtain it. Her many acts of kindness and generosity while she and he worked their behinds off in the Valverde Clinic. After losing her in death (of Ovarian Cancer) several years back, we were sure that we would lose him, too. They had rarely spent a night away from each other in over fifty years. We didn't know how this man, who didn't even know how to operate a microwave (but could diagnose a disease often with an exam only) could get along on his own. He refused to move in with any of us, it was just him and his cat.

What we came to call "the Mama Stories" still poured out of him, as though just talking about her brought her close to him. I suppose it does. But we kept urging him to tell us something about himself, and he would haltingly tell us of working in Havana as a Doctor while Batista was still in power, then going to Panama to work, gradually working his way up to the United States. We would be all agog, never having heard these stories before. We came to suspect that he had been hiding his light under Mama's bushel. But in my mind, I could still hear their heated quarrels over minor things, the heated quarrels that made up their life as surely as their love did. If there was some problem that we really didn't want Daddy involved in, I could hear Mama telling us, never mind, let me handle your father. And we knew she could. And would. You see, even I do it...Mama has once again taken over and Daddy is the man standing just behind her, peering over her shoulder. I blame him. He's the one who taught us.

25 comments:

Vee said...

There's a book here. An entire book of wonderful stories. How funny that your father never told his stories preferring your mother's over his own. He sounds like an adoring man. Good thing your mama had spunk or he'd have run her over with all that adoration.

Sally said...

Love this. ALL. Every word.

I can only relate in that my mother was a spitfire redhead! And, we all hid from her including Daddy. :)

the fly in the web said...

Lovely story...what a super, loving man.

Pondside said...

A love story - you have to write it - or more of it!

Lee said...

Wonderful post Sandi! I love the pictures! Especially the one where your parents look like there is a jungle behind them. Where was that one taken?

Love,
Lee

Judy said...

I so enjoy reading of your history...one little bit at a time. It will make a great book!

Hope your foot is mending as it should! I can see where a Kindle has been a lifesaver for you this past while.

Brian Miller said...

i think you found the perfect title...and i love the humility in it...of telling stories about mama and raising her up...that is a beautiful thing....smiles..

Carver said...

Wonderful story about your parents. They both sound like compassionate and interesting people.

Akelamalu said...

What a wonderful partnership they had - must have been LOVE. :)

Wanda @ Just Vintage said...

I thought I commented on this post the other day. Hmmmm... Must have had to jump up and go somewhere right after reading. It is heartwarming. Such sweet memories.

I'm going to go to the flea market site shortly. Thanks for sending the link.

Sandi @the WhistleStop Cafe said...

Sandi,
I haven't been by in 4ever, but I saw a comment you'd left at Kat's. I'm going to spend this evening going though your blogs... catching up with an old friend.

I hope you are well~

SandyCarlson said...

I can relate to this story and how the heat of the parents' Tas the love does. Your dad's love for your mom is downright poetic.

Thanks for this post.

bj said...

O, how I love a great love story. Thanks so much for sharing this...it made me tear up.:)

Donna said...

Oh Sandi!!!!
This was a Beautiful Story!!!
Your parents were and Are, Gorgeous!!
Happy Wednesday!
hughugs

CatHerder said...

BEAUTIFUL! <3

Hilary said...

It sounds like theirs was a fine love story and I suspect there is much more to tell. They sure do remind me of Ricky and Lucy.

Suldog said...

They both sound like wonderful and fascinating people. It's often surprising the inner strength some people show us when we might think they will wither.

Anonymous said...

That's a devoted husband to your mother. That's true and selfless love. He'll do everything for his love without any hesitation or selfishness. Hope I can find a love like that.
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Anonymous said...

Hey Sandi - I haven't been by in "forever". Always love your stories about your folks! This one is priceless too! I agree with Vee in the comment above, there's a story and book there!

I was going through old blog comments and thought I really need to visit and say "hey". Hopefully,you remember me. I'm not on Blogger but on WordPress now - my blog title might jog your memory?

Great post! Jenn

Vee said...

Well here we are wanting to listen to your Playlist and look what's happened! Good thing I have my cd. Good thinking, Sandi! Thanks again.

(I did try going to Playlist, but it is a pain in the keister. They certainly know how to mess up a wonderful thing.)

NitWit1 said...

Love the love story. My parents were typical conservative Texans; a couple who,when having a dispute, would close doors so children did not hear. These were so infrequent we strained our ears to hear what we could.

Denise said...

I have so missed coming here.. I have lost so much time in the blog world but I think I am back... I love the story about your mom and dad and the wonderful way you share...... It is almost two years now that I lost both of mine just 72 days apart and just now getting to the place that I can talk about them and share my stores.. You inspire me..........

Susie Q said...

You do have a book in this sweet friend...I truly love this story and the way you write about them. Now, about this book...
Love,
Sue

Anonymous said...

Hi sandi
How are you and hows the foot Hope all Ok with you Mary (in England)

i beati said...

heart beating and me smiling