Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Travels with my Son

Two weeks ago I had plans to go to Florence for the beauty pageant our Granddaughter was in.  It was to begin at 7p with her group actually coming onto the stage closer to 8:30.  Mac bemoaned the fact that it was held  (a.) so late (b.) so far from home and (c.) that he'd actually be sound asleep in his chair by 9. 

I told him I was going come hell or high water and that I thought I could get Wallace to go with me.  Mac  doesn't like me on the roads at night anymore when I'm on my own.  I feel the say way about him, so it wasn't so much a comment on my driving as it was on the other drivers out there.  You know, the ones who won't get out of my way. 

So, Wallace said sure, he'd love to go watch his beloved niece in her first beauty pageant and arranged to get off work in time to come drive me.  I wasn't sure when the drivers seat had been given over to him, it was sort of an implied contract, I suppose.  So, at 5p, off we go.

The first thing he did was take the right  out of the drive rather than the left.  I reminded him that the bridge was out that way, so he quickly turned around and we headed out the other way to Angelus Road.  Here, he took a right rather than a left.  And we had to turn around again.  It was now 5:10.  I wasn't getting testy yet, but I could feel it working it's way up my throat.

We headed down Macedonia/Angelus Road and took the correct left onto 151 and headed toward Hartsville.  He drove in the left hand lane.  One hand was on the wheel the other was draped over the back of the seat.  He would approach a vehicle from behind and only after I had left imprints in the dash board would he pull around.  I had warned him not to hit the brake if he felt he might be speeding when a police cruiser appeared on the other side of the four lane.  "Nothing catches our eye like brake lights, " I explained.  He looked over at me and said not a word.  Just kept driving.  I tried to make idle chitchat to calm my nerves.  I blurted out one time that "you drive just like your father" and remembered then who had taught him to drive. 

We picked up Highway 52 and since neither of us had eaten, we stopped in at Taco Bell just outside Florence for a quick bite.  It was now 5:45.  I was glad to stretch my legs, my posterior and my nerves.  After we finished eating, it was back in the truck and off we went again.  We were now in serious traffic and I kept catching myself making little moaning noises.  I looked over one time, and I swear to you I saw my five year old son in his Billy the Kid pants and dress shirt, little boots all shined up spiffy...and stifled a scream.

We arrived at my younger son's sister-in-law's house where Arianna was having the final touches of makeup applied.  I was heading into the house to greet the family and heard the two McBride boys(to men) conversing about the trip up and I was not coming off in a good light.  I stomped over to them and announced to anyone who would listen that they should be grateful I had not fallen from the truck and kissed the ground in my gratitude to arrive not only in one piece...but alive. 

It didn't go over well with the driver who refused to relinquish my keys.  I swear he had a snear on his face and an evil laugh rumbling in his throat when we finally headed for home that night.  It's not a trip I would wish on anyone!  We were very nearly home when the sharp curve that separates Macedonia Church Road from Angelus Road appeared and I squealed in panic..."curve ahead...SHARP CURVE!"   Oh Lord, thank you for delivering me safely to the arms of my beloved...Amen.

43 comments:

Vee said...

You've got me laughing! "I looked over one time, and I swear to you I saw my five year old son in his Billy the Kid pants and dress shirt, little boots all shined up spiffy...and stifled a scream." Right here I was howling. People worry about me at 8:05 PM when laughing about anything. Okay, lesson learned, right?

Oh, how'd your grandgirlie do?

Sally said...

Oh yeah, I can totally relate. I think when I can no longer drive, I'll move somewhere on a bus line. :)

SandyCarlson said...

You make me laugh, too. What an adventure. You are a great family.

Brian Miller said...

lol. i fell asleep one night while T was out the wheel and woke up screaming...she was just getting off the interstate...yeah...

ancient one said...

I can ride so much more at ease with my daughter than I can with my sons... husband rides better with the sons... thanks for coming by to visit.. your blooming trees are beautiful.. we have a couple of apple trees in bloom..

Vee said...

Aha! I should've guessed that one!

bj said...

You had me laughing so so hard..I go thru the same darn thing with Mr. Sweet. He IS sweet but NOT the best driver and I, like you, imprint the dash, moan, groan and get looked at...REAL HARD.

Hahhhaa...well, I am glad ya got there in one piece!
xo bj

ds said...

Tee hee! I dislike taking long road trips with Mr. L-S because he, too, is a one-handed driver (though not quite as casual as your son). Fortunately, I can still read in the car...
But you made it. There, and back again!

Pondside said...

What a great story!
I hope you REALLY enjoyed the pageant to make up for the wild ride!

Finding Pam said...

While my hubsand is a safe driver, I do hate it when he drives with his knees.

I feel safe with my sons driving because I taught them how to drive. I can so relate to being that backseat driver and bracing, stomping my foot on my imaginary brakes. I am thankful you made it safely home. I can't see well at night so I usually do not drive.

Maggie May said...

I can relate to that description of your travel nerves and laughed about your vision of your son in his pedal car!
BUT I have complete confidence in my son's driving but am a nervous wreck with my husband.

Glad you managed to enjoy the evening in spite of it.

Nuts in May

Strawberry Jam Anne said...

I can so sympathise with you Sandi - I dislike driving so much now but don't really like being a passenger either, forever stamping my foot down on "the brake" and clutching the seat. Must be a bit unnerving for the driver but he/she should be where I am sitting!! Glad you got to see your adorable grand-daughter in the pageant. A x

i beati said...

i'm remembering the last time my son nearly kissed the bumper in front of us and I applied imaginary brakes and he laughed and laughed. Our reflexes as we age huh?

i beati said...

i'm remembering the last time my son nearly kissed the bumper in front of us and I applied imaginary brakes and he laughed and laughed. Our reflexes as we age huh?

i beati said...

i'm remembering the last time my son nearly kissed the bumper in front of us and I applied imaginary brakes and he laughed and laughed. Our reflexes as we age huh?

Pam said...

thank you for that much needed laugh this morning. goodness, I can so relate when my husband drives sometimes. I think there is a permanent imprint of my hand and nails on the door handle where I grip so hard.

How'd your granddaughter do?

Lee said...

Even though he'd been in accidents I trusted my ex's reflexes on the road much better than mine. Sadly it didn't work the same way in reverse. And I can remember my Mom sitting in the passenger's seat and putting on the brakes over on her side of the car. LOL These days I try to stay at the wheel when I don't trust the other driver but if they are better than I am then I'm happy to play navigator.

Great story!

Hugs,
Lee

Mickle in NZ said...

Oh dear, just as well Wallace wasn't driving aroung here with hills steep, roads narrow and cars parked in awkward places. I got my drivers license but I now don't drive by choice.

The world is a much safer place with Mickle not driving!

I do hope for a sequel on how beautiful your darling granddaughter looked and was.

Care and huggles, Michelle and my darling wussycat, Zebby, xxx and purrrrumbles*

*if only I could capture the energy he emits while purring to save on my power bills, lol!!!

lailani said...

{{giggling}} oh that was funny! My oldest is only 16 and has been driving since August. Every now and then I get to still have him drive me somewhere. It's wrong that that kind of stress (there is a curb there!!) does not burn calories!

Donna said...

OMWord!!! They can go With me but I'm Driving!!!
Geez Girl...He sounds...unmanageable?Hahaaa
hughugs

Deb said...

Why hello stranger ~ Glad you made it back home safely! The older I get I find that I only really trust my driving. My husband says I have control issues ~ whatever ! Be safe !

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

lol...that was too funny. Thank goodness you arrived in one piece.

Jeni said...

Sounds very familiar to me when riding with my older daughter who just happens to have a leadfoot for openers plus she absolutely loves doing things while driving that she knows will irritate me greatly or scare the living crap out of me -either/or ya know! I told her on one expedition about 16-17 years ago that judging by the way these little marker things along the road were whizzing by us I figured we should be airborne at the next curve. She loved that I was white as a ghost one minute and a bit green around the gills the next. I made a pact with younger daughter too that she will never ever force me to ride any long distances, ever again, like to hospitals or doctor appointments and such with her sister at the wheel. My nerves can't take it these days ya know.

Mima said...

I totally sympathise with you. It is so hard having people drive you, when my wheelchair is loaded in the back of the car I can't see very much as I am so high, so I have to trust that the carer is driving safely - something that hasn't always been the case as I have had some truly awful carers!! I am very lucky now that I have a stable care team all of who drive sensibly - makes a big difference!!

Lib said...

Lol I can relate!
Hope things are going well ur way!
Blessins',Lib

Hilary said...

Too funny. I'm very tense when my son is driving too. He's an aggressive driver.

Anya said...

Great adventure
what a lovely family you are :))))

(@^.^@)

Akelamalu said...

LOL and how was the pageant?

Suldog said...

Sounds like quite the adventure. It had me laughing.

bettygram said...

I am also the person you do not want in the up front passenger seat.

Anna said...

Sandi lol 'not fallen from the truck and kissed the ground in my gratitude to arrive not only in one piece...but alive.' that was good one. I had cousin who drove like crazy, I thought I will spit my heart out. Thanks for sharing your 'exciting' story. Hope all is well. How did the little one do? Did she win? Anna :)

david mcmahon said...

Hilarious, Sandi. Sounds like a ride to remember!
I want to know what Mac said when he read this post!

Retiredandcrazy said...

I can relate to that so much Sandi. When I was in Switzerland last week being drive up and down mountain roads by my 78 year old friend Monica I was a nervous wreck.

Mary Isabella and Kiley too! said...

What an adventure!!!...m..

Crystal Jigsaw said...

We have little country lanes round here and no lamps so it's pretty hairy in parts.

Glad you did get there in one piece though!

CJ xx

jay said...

Oh, gosh, I'd have been absolutely LIVID if someone had refused to give me my own car keys. Does he realise he may have damaged his relationship with you for good?

I'm glad you survived the trip. I've had some like that, and it's not at all comfortable.

Tara said...

Your adventures always make me smile!

Kat said...

Too funny!

Well...how did Arianna do? I'm quite sure she won. Right?

Hugs!
Kat

San said...

"Nothing catches our eye like brake lights." Sandy, that's priceless. I'll have to try it out on my father-in-law. If I ever get in the car with him again.

wsxwhx700 said...

IS VERY GOOD..............................

Merisi said...

I feel your pain! ;-)

(Well, in my case it is the other way round: My youngest feels she knows how I should drive. Need say no more, do I?)

diney said...

I turn into a complete nag when my hubby drives - he is so fixed on listening to the radio that he seems to lose any concentration he may have previously had and I have to squeal out if brake lights flash in front, or we are coming to a roundabout...yesterday was great as I drove to a party we were attending which was a 3 hour round trip. We had to roof off as it was such a lovely sunny day, and it was such a pleasure. I'm going to insist on driving more. As for my son - I have my eyes closed most of the time when he is at the wheel, not because he is a bad driver, but because it is so odd that this little boy is driving. (well, he is 28 actually, but it's difficult to adapt sometimes!!!)

diney said...

I turn into a complete nag when my hubby drives - he is so fixed on listening to the radio that he seems to lose any concentration he may have previously had and I have to squeal out if brake lights flash in front, or we are coming to a roundabout...yesterday was great as I drove to a party we were attending which was a 3 hour round trip. We had to roof off as it was such a lovely sunny day, and it was such a pleasure. I'm going to insist on driving more. As for my son - I have my eyes closed most of the time when he is at the wheel, not because he is a bad driver, but because it is so odd that this little boy is driving. (well, he is 28 actually, but it's difficult to adapt sometimes!!!)