Monday, September 22, 2008

I don't do windows...here's why

Mama was a neat freak. Okay, that sounds like a popular 60's song, you know, like "Papa's Got a Brand New Bag". I never really understood that song and the more I listened to it, the less I wanted to understand. It seemed somehow misogynistic to me. If you aren't sure of the meaning of this word, rather than tell you to look it up, I'll just say look at the letters "gyn" and tell me if that brings anything to mind. Okay? So anyway, as I was saying, Mama was a neat freak. She didn't get over this ailment till she and Daddy moved to Ruby and she suddenly had a yard big enough to go nuts in. I come by this malady honestly, you see. So, since she was at the Clinic working with Daddy every morning and playing in the yard every afternoon, she found the housework going downhill. She discovered what closets were for. One thing she really didn't like was dirty windows. She was a so so disciplaniarian, grounding you for two weeks one day and realizing no one was paying her any attention two days later. So the punishment became "go wash the windows." I hate washing windows, but I'll do it if I can't get anyone else to oblige. Washing windows always makes me feel as though I'm being punished. I could always bribe the boys to wash windows when they were living at home...boys will do nearly anything for pocket money. Easy marks that they were, they have homes of their own now...I wonder who's washing their windows?

So, I was standing at the sliding glass doors leading onto the porch Saturday and I noticed that I couldn't see out of them very well. I wondered when was the last time they'd been washed. I am ashamed to admit that I honestly couldn't remember. Sometime around April 1st I think. Then I decided I'd best look at the windows on the storm door...the windows in the bedrooms and baths...the living room windows...I thought of the windex commercial with the Magpies and wondered if they'd pay me a visit were I to wash the windows, inside and out. I love Magpies. I miss the ones who lived in our garden in England. They were always stealing anything bright and shiny...they lived in the huge Cherry tree in the front garden.

I gathered my paper towels and a bucket with warm soapy water for the window frames and the windex for the windows. I set to work. I got the house windows first, and then moved to the storm door. All nice and squeaky clean, I then tackled the sliding glass (acre of glass) door. After doing the outside, I started in on the inside. I took my wad of paper towels and after spraying them liberally, went to work. The paper caught somehow and I jerked my hand forward and then suddenly found myself in pain. Terrible pain. I looked at my hand and the joint where the finger meets the hand was already starting to swell. "Well, damn!" I whimpered. Yeah, I was being a bit whiney...not only do I hate doing windows, but now this!

Mac came in from the garden and I was sitting with an icepack on my hand. "What's wrong with your hand?" he wanted to know. I was scowling, I'm sure..."I think I broke my finger," I moaned. He walked over to me and looking at the swollen finger joint wanted to know how I had done it. I assured him he would never believe me in a million years and he kept insisting I tell him. "Alright, I broke it washing windows, okay? You happy now?" I was totally amazed when he said "and what makes you think I won't believe that? You'll do anything to get out of washing windows." Men. Can't live with them. Can't just kill them.

51 comments:

Vee said...

Okay, I loved this story...I loved how your mom wasn't much of a disciplinarian, but she found something that truly was punishment. It could give parents ideas...but you need lessons in window washing.

Hope that your hand is feeling better every minute. Ackkk. You really attacked that one with a vengeance, didn't you?!

Lib said...

Hi Sandi,
Hope your finger is better.
Speaking of windows thats on the "TO DO LIST" here. I never had to wash windows for punishment ,but its not a favorite chore of mine. See you have a good excuse ,I don;t!lol
Happy Autumn and have a great day!
Blessins',Lib

Aunt Julie said...

This is a great story! And remember--if you get the sliding glass door TOO clean, kids can run through it. It's happened at my house, so beware! BTW, got a Great New Giveaway going on over at my place, to commemorate my 100th post--please stop by!

NeereAnDear said...

Well I sure hope your finder is ok.... going to be hard for you to type with a broken one... do let us know if you are doing alright...

The story itself is a always full of humor... I love coming and reading your stories ... you can get lost in them

LOTS OF HUGS

and thanks for keeping the laughs coming

JO

Anonymous said...

Ouch!
I hyper-extended one of my thumbs a few years ago. It's a tad weak, so it's apt to happen again at any given moment.
J did the windows before our friend from Wisconsin came to visit, last month. That's it until Spring. Once in awhile one or the other of us will go around getting Molly's nose prints or the g'kids handprints. We aren't really aggresive about it, though.

Anonymous said...

Im so sorry.It does hurt to keep things done. I have a burned finger now.
I can't say anything about your mom because it sounds like we would have gotten along. Don't go to my blog today =) hehe

Greg C said...

Great story. My wife will go through cleaning spells and it drives me crazy. The Pope could stop by and she would tell him to sit and wait while she finished cleaning.

Anonymous said...

OUCH!! Poor you.

I don't do windows, either. I have a torn rotator cuff on my right shoulder and let's just say it hurts to put that kind of pressure on, or do that kind of repetitive movement.

If I want to use my right arm for repetitive movements, I'd rather save it for something fun.

Like blogging. ;)

Rhoda @ Southern Hospitality said...

Hey, ms. Sandi, thanks for stopping by to see me! I always love your comments.

Rhoda @ Southern Hospitality said...

Hey, ms. Sandi, thanks for stopping by to see me! I always love your comments.

Donna said...

Geez! You clean windows like I clean closet doors!!Hahaa...hughugs

Alison said...

Ouch! I hope your hand feels better soon.

I need to wash my windows--I can't remember the last time I did them, either.

Mockingbird Hill said...

Yikes!! I feel your pain..about the windows, I mean. I can't wait to finish all of the "renovations" and get out a vacuum and dust rag and get clean again! Hmmm..hope I can find one in this mess..

Take care of that finger, missy...

Cassie

windycorner said...

Washing windows does seem like punishment, but the result is nice. Love your story...thanks for the giggle.
Holley

Anonymous said...

Is it feeling better now? Let's see the last time I washed windows was ...........hmmmmm......I can't remember. But I did notice all the spiderwebs across them this morning. Always happens this time of the year and it's heck trying to get the upstairs windows cleaned of the webs. I saw a magpie once perched on a tall post at the tennis courts and He/she had a aluminum pie plate in it's beak.

SandyCarlson said...

That's true! Can't live with 'em, can't kill 'em....

Windows are about the worst of the chores. Down there with washing the car because no sooner is it done, it is undone. Always feels like a waste of time, yet it has to be done.

I once broke a toe answering the phone, so I can understand your injury!

Lavinia said...

Oh dear! My my....I hope the finger is okay! What a way to injure your finger.....

I hate washing windows too. Fast way I know to get sore arms!~

~Red Tin Heart~ said...

Oh that is funny! It sounds like something I would do.
I actually got a piece of toilet tissue caught in my eye the other night when I blew my nose!
Beat that one. LoL
Sending you love, Nita

i beati said...

well I despise window washing and always think it looks wonderful but I'm always rushed and have too much to do .My mother ironed all sheets and all. I don't own an iron?? sk

Maggie May said...

I don't often do mine until I think my eyesight is going!
Sorry about the finger. Hope it is better. Maybe you did TOO much all in one go!
Loved this post.

david mcmahon said...

Er, Mac, something tells me all your knuckles are broken too!

Shrinky said...

Oh, poor hon, hope it was only sprained and not broken?

I am ashamed to admit to it, but my windows were cleaned for the first time in almost A YEAR, last week. See, it takes really long ladders to reach up on to the outside, and being as how hubby is ascaird of heights, and that I have steadfastly hung on to the rule that gettinf up there is a "blue", not a "pink" job, we need to get the so-called professionals around.

This being a small island, my eldest having a bad break up with the window-cleaners much loved and eldest daughter, he hasn't deingned to to visit for a while.

It sure is a relief to be able to see through the glass to the garden again (grin).

I love your way of telling a tale, and yeah, 'tis often a pity we wives are only allowed to commit murder in the heart..

Dumdad said...

Hi, Great post and thanks for popping over to my world. I love the picture in your title - just like our cat, Scabby; she has similar markings.

Love Bears All Things said...

You sound so-o like me. It seems I end up hurting myself whenever I do anything. I'll be bleeding and wonder how that happened. Or I'll have a bruise and can't remember bumping into anything. Last week, while choosing items to bring back from the other house and packing, I pulled a muscle in my back. Honey Bear's first reaction was: "you must have been doing something you shouldn't".
I usually only wash the inside of most of my windows. But the ones I look out of all of the time, I do both sides. My Mom had us do windows as part of Spring and Fall cleaning.
Mama Bear

Country Cottage Chic said...

Housework is very dangerous & makes you ugly - avoid at all costs!!!!!!

Susie Q said...

Oh Sandy...even with a painful finger, you spin a story so well. I am sitting here with a bog 'ol smile on my face. Now, I hate that you hurt your finger but I have SO been there.
Mine are only clean because a new service opened up here and had great deals. They even gave an extra % off for military and retirees. : )
The nicest young man came and did all our windows, inside and out, upstairs and down, storm door, side lights, transom in kitchen...for less than $75. I was thrilled and even frugal old Billy was quite pleased he and I did not have to do them!

Oh well, now I have to go clean the rest of the house and wash a pile of laundry. He could not be persuadeded to hire that out too!
*grin*

Feel better!

Love,
Sue

Akelamalu said...

I hate washing windows but not enough to break my finger so I won't have to do it. ((wink, wink))

Hilary said...

I love how the finger keeps you from finishing the windows but not from blogging about it. ;)

I hope you heal in a hurry and that someone else has completed the windows for you by then.

imbeingheldhostage said...

Oh thank you, I haven't cackled all day.... whew, it was almost a shock to my system, so thanks. again.

Cath said...

I have a feeling all his fingers might be broken! lol
You poor thing! I hope you're ok. Take it easy and let Mac do the windows.

Anonymous said...

And so, is it broken? Jammed?

I'll be thinking of you when I get the energy to wash my windows. I believe I can safely say it's been longer than April since I've washed mine. Maybe April 2006.

Merisi said...

*giggle*

How's your sweet finger?

I closed myself out of my car today. Abroad. In Hungary. Key in car. Long story. The short of it is I am back home. With my car. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Sorry that you hurt your finger and I hope it heals soon; however, I have to say that I just laughed out loud!

Penny from Enjoying The Simple Things said...

What a great story about growing up and your mom....Hope your finger is ok! I don't do windows either...they always end up streaky no matter what I do!
Hugs,
Penny

Kris McCracken said...

This post resonated with me very much. I once broke my toe bringing the washing in from the line!

Mary Isabella and Kiley too! said...

Girl, Girl, Girl I am so sorry about your finger. You are right about men. LOL have a better week my friend...m...

Unknown said...

LOL I tell you men are a piece of work sometimes!

Hope your finger mends soon Sandi x

Mima said...

I really hope that your finger wasn't broken, just bruised, and that it is healing up fast! LOL at your Mum and the windows punishment, my step-father had similar ideas, but it wasn't the windows, it was sweeping up the leaves! I really hated doing it too!!

Jamie Dawn said...

Window Washing as a punishment. I like that!
I HATE washing windows too, also, in addition.
I always end up leaving streaks and have to go back and touch them up.
I sure hope you didn't actually break your finger!!
Use your non-injured hand and give Mac a slap.

:-)

Jamie Dawn said...

Now, I feel guilty for having not washed my windows in a long time.
I better just leave them. I don't want to break a finger or anything.

The Accidental Author said...

Sandi - there's a little something for you over on my blog. VLiF

Kari (GrannySkywalker) said...

Oooohhhh. Windows are supposed to be WASHED. Didn't know that....here I thought all the dust and pollution was nature's way of fogging up the windows enough to make me believe it wasn't sunny, bright and hotter than H, E, double toothpicks outside. LOL

ancient one said...

Hope your "ouch" is feeling better. I need to do some serious cleaning around here. Windows really need cleaning. If I could only stop reading bogs...LOL

nippercatshome said...

Hope your hand feels better, I hate doing windows but love seeing the results. I have 2 dogs who one of them loves sitting in my bay window and putting his nose prints all over the window, needless to say I have to clean it every day..Love your blog..take care Mary

Jules~ said...

oh my goodness! Is your finger really broken? I am so sorry.
You know what? I can't stand to wash windows either....only I don't have an excuse. And I'd say it has been a lot longer than a few months since mine were cleaned.

Adla said...

OOOoooo no tell me about windexing the windows...I'm not even halfway there. By the way I love the ad with the magpies. too funny! Miss your stories Sandi, hope you are keeping well :)

chat soon, Adla

Mary said...

Oh Sandi hope your finger is feeling better and that shows you not to clean windows!! Hope all else is well Mary

Sandi McBride said...

For all who have been sweet enough to ask, I have a hairline fracture in the third joint, and it interferes with typing somewhat, but not enough to make me lose my blogging addiction!
hugs
Sandi

Stacey said...

LOL now I see the irony of your swan song!! It's a horrible feeling, having a stubbed finger, I don't even want to know what a broken finger feels like, hon. You probably don't realize how much you use it until you break it, huh.

Hugs. ~Stacey

Lee said...

Thank you for sharing the story, Sandi. I know I heard it over the Scrabble board but I still like reading your posts. Sorry I missed the hint.

Hope the finger is healing nicely now that you've got that cast on it.

Hugs!
Lee

indicaspecies said...

I thoroughly enjoyed this. You are a great story teller Sandi and I can see why David of Authorblog picks up your posts on POTD. Congratulations.